POSITION |
FAMILY SITUATION |
CHILD'S CHARACTERISTICS |
ONLY |
Birth is a miracle. Parents have no previous experience. Retains 200% attention from both parents. May become rival of one parent. Can be over-protected and spoiled. |
Likes being the center of adult attention. Often has difficulty sharing with siblings and peers. Prefers adult company and uses adult language. |
OLDEST |
Dethroned by next child. Has to learn to share. Parent expectations are usually very high. Often given resposnsibility and expected to set an example. |
May become authoritarian or strict. Feels power is his right. Can become helpful if encouraged. May turn to father after birth of next child. |
SECOND |
He has a pacemaker. There is always someone ahead. |
Is more competitive, wants to overtake older child. May become a rebel or try to outdo everyone. Competition can deteriorate into rivalry. |
MIDDLE |
Is "sandwiched" in. May feel squeezed out of a position of privilege and significance. |
May be even-tempered, "take it or leave it" attitude. May have trouble finding a place or become a fighter of injustice. |
YOUNGEST |
Has many mothers and fathers. Older children try to educate him. Never dethroned. |
Wants to be bigger than the others. May have huge plans that never work out. Can stay the "baby." Frequently spoiled. |
TWIN |
One is usually stronger or more active. Parents may see one as the older. |
Can have identity problems. Stronger one may become the leader. |
"GHOST CHILD" |
Child born after the death of the first child may have a "ghost" in front of him. Mother may becime over-protective. |
Child may exploit mother's over-concern for his well-being, or he may rebel, and protest the feeling of being compared to an idealized memory. |
ADOPTED CHILD |
Parents may be so thankful to have a child that they spoil him. They may try to compensate for the loss of his biological parents. |
Child may become very spoiled and demanding. Eventually, he may resent or idealize the biological parents. |
ONLY BOY AMONG GIRLS |
Usually with women all the time, if father is away. |
May try to prove he is the man in the family, or become effeminate. |
ONLY GIRL AMONG BOYS |
Older brothers may act as her protectors. |
Can become very feminine, or a tomboy and outdo the brothers. May try to please the father. |
ALL BOYS |
If mother wanted a girl, can be dressed as a girl. |
Child may capitalize on assigned role or protest it vigorously. |
ALL GIRLS |
May be dressed as a boy. |
Child may capitalize on assigned role or protest it vigorously. |